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  • Writer's picturedianamedina97

Goodbye letter for A&M

We did it! I feel like it was just yesterday that I wrote my first blog about starting my journey at TAMU. A Lot has happened these past few years, so I want to catch you up. Let us start from where we left off the lessons that I learned my first year.

The lessons that came back and the new ones I learned, some came easy. Some of them hard to swallow, but it is important to understand that God does things for a reason.

Remember the first lesson I learned my first year? it became my whole journey. I always had to remind myself to never give up till the end. Just like the rest of the world, Covid-19 took a toll on my last year at A&M. I made it the best year that I could be. School shut down walks around campus were not a thing, and I missed seeing my classmates. Zoom university was hard, but I had to remind myself that I just had to hang in there for a few months. I had two classes that I legit was just trying to survive in and pass. They were online it was hard trying to get help and doing my best to teach myself the material. One class was killing me weekly, and the breakdowns were real. I just prayed every day that God would help me pass. The months passed and my grade was not anywhere close to where it needed to be. At times I taught it was pointless to keep trying when there was no way I would get the grade I needed. I didn’t give up and worked my but off because I was determined to pass it. I knew that I worked so hard to get to my last semester to let one class stop me from walking the stage. Then finals came, and I could not believe how close my grade was, but still wasn’t enough. I remember bawling my eyes out after sessions because I knew that in the second moment of finally walking the stage was gonna be ripped away. While everyone was celebrating because graduation was a week away. I was in my room stressed and working on assignments that could help me get the few points I needed. The day before grades were due came, and I knew that I was a few points away. I had been speaking to my professor all semester and she was such a saint and allowed me to turn assignments into the hour before grades were due, and all I could do is wait and hope that it was enough. Then I got an email saying that she did the best she could, but I needed one more point she gave me a tentative grade. So while people were walking the stage ( I opted out of December graduation bc of health concerns, and decided to walk in May) I was in my room finishing this assignment.

In January, my grade changed, I HAD DONE IT I HAD GRADUATED FROM TAMU! I remember running to my sister and giving her the news and bawling because I had worked so hard for this moment and I finally did it. It was a long time coming but my college journey had officially ended and I was getting ready to walk the stage at Kyle Field in march. Imagine if I would have given up on the class and dropped out of the class or let my class be an F? I would be taking one class this spring and stressed. I know it was not easy plus every college student can agree that college can be so Amazing and stressful but boy PLEASE NEVER GIVE UP! Don’t give up on your degree, Getting accepted to your dream college, or pursuing your dream job! if It was easy everyone would do it, and if it isn’t hard then you not pushing yourself to your potential. Don’t give up on yourself ever because your capable of anything you set your mind to and I’m rooting for you always<3

Another lesson that became my whole lifeline since my first semester at TAMU.I was to always put myself first, and know that my worth is not decided by others. Sometimes, you need to close the door and walk away from something to heal. My whole time in TAMU I was so focused on work, school, and friends that I didn’t see the pain and the stress that I was putting myself thru. So many things happened during my final years at TAMU that will haunt me, but time heals everything and I learned so much from it. I learned who my real friends were and who really would be there through the goods and the bad. Some relationships that I will cherish forever, also some that I am thankful that happened even if it broke me into a million people. I learned that some things aren’t meant to be forever and taught me another life lesson no matter how hard it was. Taught me that I’m worth more than what anyone has to say and I should not have to put myself down and put my emotions on the side because someone does not think they're valid. I should not let anyone try to tell me the type of person I am or what type of person I deserve because they don’t know me the way I know myself. Most importantly I learned that putting your time and energy into people that do not respect you or things that do not bring you happiness is not worth it. Do what makes you happy and take care of yourself now no one gonna love you and care about you like you so pick your head up and let god take care of the rest. Know that some people who you think are gonna be in your life forever aren’t meant to be there and just come to your life to teach you something and walk away. I know that even if it's hard to walk away from relationships it could be the best thing that you could do. Trust me the people who are meant to be in your life and care about you will show it and never make you doubt.

It’s okay to make mistakes because sometimes that’s the only way that you learn. My whole life I gave everything into my friendships and work when I shouldn’t. I learned that not everything is what you think. I learned that I trust too easily and bad at seeing red flags from people and situations. A lot of pain came from those situations also I’m glad that I learned that now instead of later in life. You want to believe that no one would ever want to hurt you and that they appreciate everything that you did for them but then go and stab you in the back in less than a second. I know now that no matter how many times people try to make you feel like your the reason for something and are the blame just to cover themselves own self and I 100% believe that people show you their true colors when they are mad. I don’t want this to be all about heartbreak so let's move on to the good things now, should we?

Aggieland was my first time being in a place all by myself and getting a taste of the real world. College Station will have my heart forever just as it had gloomy days it had so many fun memories. Late nights at the north gate and Fuego and the lobby during finals. Walks around campus with some of my closest friends that visited full of self-care.From places that would forever be in my heart that helped me find myself and Jesus when I needed him the most to long game days and working events.Nights full of hope and dreams, and dancing around my room to my favorite songs and snuggles with my honey girl. When I moved into this small college town I did not know what to expect and had no idea what it was gonna throw my way but I was full of hope. I’m so proud of the women Aggieland has made me because I know that the 19-year old that moved into Park West was not the same one who moved out this past December. She’s stronger, hopeful, and knows now that at the end of the day that she put her heart and soul into these past few years and will never regret it. Would I change some things yes, would I ever wish bad upon the people who left me scars? No, because that is not the type of person I am. I know that at the end of the day the good times we had were the best. I wish things didn’t end the way they did yes God knows why things happen and I’m gonna trust him.

I want to thank everyone who supported me through college and rooted for me the whole time even when I didn’t believe in myself. Those who welcomed me in with open hands, and slowly became like family to me. Trust me when I say that your support meant the world to me and it makes me so emotional to think that I did it and that I had people rooting for me even when I felt the most alone. I don’t know what life has in store for me next but I know I can not wait to begin the process of moving to my dream city Los angles and working in the entertainment helping others make their dreams come true. To get my license and begin my life as a full-time adult. Aggieland was such a journey that I am forever grateful for and I’m thankful to the amazing people who it brought into my life and for the Friendships that gave me. I can not wait for Covid to be over so we can go back to some normality because this girl misses concerts.



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